Does your child at times get really angry for a variety of different reasons? Do you find yourself getting worked up, frustrated and worrying about your child’s outbursts? There are some simple techniques that you can employ to help your children control their anger.
First, children need to learn to recognize and identify the signals that they are becoming angry, BEFORE they act out that anger. Signs can be that they clinch their fist, or grind their teeth.
Talk to your child about anger. Discuss with them that which causes them to become angry; how they feel when anger is present within them. By recognizing the feelings that rise within them, they can become aware of an on-coming anger episode and choose to deflect their anger in productive ways.
Once they understand the causes of the frustration that brings on anger, teach them how to express that anger with appropriate words and actions. Simply yelling at them to “quiet down,” or threatening them with violent responses (by you) doesn’t accomplish a constructive resolution. Perhaps provide them — or let them choose — secret words or phrases to use when they’re getting angry so that they still have the verbal release without the offensive language.
We all know as parents that kids can get under our skin and frustrate us. At the same time kids learn from YOU. If they see you respond with outbursts or violence then in many instances they will adopt that action-response because it is what they’ve seen, what they’ve learned of how they too should respond.
So it is wise to discuss and deal with their anger BEFORE they get angry, at a time when they are calm and can process that which you’re explaining and teaching them.
Once they’ve learned to recognize the signs of an anger episode, teach them simple techniques to avoid acting out their anger, and just as importantly a way to calm themselves down on their own. For example counting from one to ten, singing a happy song, or the art of breathing deeply in and out until the anger passes.
We’ve included a video highlighting the above topic – Simple steps to help Children with Anger issues .